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genlisae
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* * *
Genre: Drama, Modern, Sci-fi, Dark, Crime
Word Count For Chapter: 12650
Rating: NC17 / M for story as a whole.
Advisories: Language.
What?
Yes, you read that right. That's it. Language.
Okay, maybe I could warn for angst as well. Just the tiniest little smidgen though and if I really, really stretched it I could probably warn for implied adult situations. I would really be reaching for that one though.
Oh, just go read it! I promise it will be worth it. My daughter loved it (mildly edited version). This one is extra long compared to usual too!
Quick note: Dirk is a little confused and a lot not paying attention! *nod* Hopefully that will make sense when you get there.
7:05 AM Friday, May 9
Tybalt opened the door, “Isn’t it way too early for you to be here to take Jules to school?” he asked still rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, “Come to think of it, why are you here to take Jules to school? Didn’t you two …”
Telesto cocked his head staring perplexed at Tybalt’s mask, “Do you sleep in that thing?”
Tybalt frowned, “Sometimes. It’s comfortable.”
Chuckling, Telesto stepped past him into the house, “You know that’s weird, right?”
“This coming from you?” Tybalt asked as he closed the door, “Seriously?”
“I prefer to think of myself as unique. Nice hair by the way. I love it.”
“Piss off,” Tybalt grouched, “I just woke up.”
“Aww, touchy subject?” Telesto made as if to hug the grumpy red-head, “Don’t worry, you’re still beautiful even when you’re a mess.”
“Get off me!” Tybalt pushed him away.
“Jules!” Tybalt bellowed as he made a hasty retreat up the stairs, “The annoying little shit is here and if you don’t get down here and deal with him I am going to hurt him.”
Telesto smiled to himself as he sank down in the chair. Tybalt was way too easy to get worked up.
If only everything was that easy.
A few moments later Juliet made her way down the stairs beaming a bright smile, “Morning. You are here early.”
“Hey,” Telesto got to his feet pulling her into a hug, “Needed to get out of the house for a bit before I went crazy.”
“Spending too much time there recently?” Juliet grinned at him.
Telesto let out a heavy sigh, “Among other things, yeah.”
Juliet stood back regarding him critically for a long moment. She took note of the hunched shoulders, the antsy shifting from one foot to the other and the way he was staring at the floor fiddling with his hands.
Her brows arched up, interested, “Let’s go for a walk.”
She waited until they were well away from the house, headed toward the gardens before she spoke again.
“So, is it just all the time you have been spending together that has you acting like him or is it something else?”
Telesto sighed, “I can’t do this, Jules.”
“Since when do you give up?” she shot him a stern glare, “You can do this.”
“No,” he shook his head, “I really can’t.”
She turned into the hedge maze where they would have a bit more privacy. If this conversation was going where she thought it was they just might need it, “Okay, why not? What happened?”
Telesto worried at his lip for a long moment before he responded, “He’s started talking. Like really talking about things that matter, you know? Like he trusts me.”
“And?” she prompted, confused, “That is what you were trying for wasn’t it?”
“Well, yeah,” Telesto agreed, “I just … I don’t know. It’s hard to explain. I guess I’m nervous.”
Juliet couldn’t help a small laugh at that, “You are allowed to be nervous.”
“I guess,” Telesto ran a tired hand over his neck, “I just don’t like feeling this way.”
Juliet turned the situation over in her mind while they walked. This was not quite how she’d envisioned things to turn out but if she thought about it she couldn’t say she was surprised.
“Do you like him?” she asked after a moment, “He’s not a jerk or anything, right? He’s a friend?”
“No, he’s not a jerk,” Telesto smiled slightly, “and yeah, I do like him.”
“And you know him well enough by now to have figured out what he needs?”
“I don’t know,” Telesto admitted, dejected, “I think so, part of it anyway.”
“What you have figured out, can you do that?”
He didn’t hesitate for even a moment to answer that question, “Absolutely. I don’t even have to try.”
She smiled encouragingly, “So, be what he needs.”
“But what if we are wrong?” he asked staring sadly down at the ground.
“Do you think we are wrong?”
His voice was a tiny little whisper as he shook his head and answered, “No.”
Juliet reached out her hands placing them on his shoulders, ducking down slightly to meet his eyes as he looked up. He looked so confused and uncertain. Her heart went out to him.
“Then trust you. Ripp does.”
* * *
12:00 PM Friday, May 9
Ripp leaned back against the tree and watched as Lilith crossed the lawn toward him, a content smile playing about his lips.
Content. What an odd feeling.
“Hey stranger,” Lilith said grinning as she flopped down on her stomach beside him, “We’ve barely seen you these past few weeks. What’s up?”
Ripp shrugged, “Nothing.”
Lilith arched a brow, her fingers idly plucking at the grass, “Now I know something is up. Where have you been?”
Ripp shrugged again, “Hanging out with Tel.”
She cocked her head, “I’d noticed you two seem to have gotten friendly. I never saw it happening,” she admitted, “he’s just so …”
“Confusing?’ Ripp supplied when she trailed off without finishing the sentence, “Cocky? Obnoxious? Irritating?”
Lilith blinked at him, “I was going to say overwhelming and huggy, but okay.”
“He is awfully touchy isn’t he?” Ripp mused, his brow furling in thought, “Weird.”
Lilith studied him for a moment. Something was going on, something big. First the haircut, then he’d pretty much disappeared and they only saw him occasionally and always with Telesto. She was worried.
“Talk to me Ripp.”
He turned his head to look at his oldest and closest friend. If he could tell anyone what was going on, it was Lilith.
Giving her a sad little smile he shook his head, “It’s weird,” he said quietly, “right now, at this moment, I am content. I don’t remember ever being content. Took me a few minutes to figure it out.”
Lilith frowned, puzzled, “That’s good right?”
“It is,” he agreed, tilting his head back to study the leaves in the tree, “It won’t last though. As soon as I go home I am going to go right back to feeling like I am drowning again.”
She didn’t know what to say so she kept quiet and waited for him to continue.
“I don’t want to drown,” he added at last, “I can feel it. Like it’s being slowly choked out of me. Suffocating. I want to breathe, Lil, but it’s easier sometimes if I don’t because when I do, I’m scared.”
“It’s okay to be scared.”
He nodded, “But it’s not okay to hide. I stopped hiding a bit. It was good. I felt better. I feel better, but it just makes the drowning worse when I have to go back.”
“So maybe,” she began hesitantly, knowing what she was about to say was not something she would ever have suggested to anyone else, “you shouldn’t go back.”
Ripp didn’t answer right away, staring thoughtfully up at the leaves instead. It would be that simple wouldn’t it? Just walk away. Trade one form of hiding for another. He couldn’t do it. The thought of just walking away scared him more than staying. Where would he go? Lilith’s? No. She had enough to deal with already. So did Dirk. Damon and Tel would let him stay for a while until he found somewhere else but then they might know too and that scared him more than anything his father could possibly do to him. If his friends found out the truth, no, that was not an option. When would he be able to stop hiding?
“Maybe,” he said at last, “Or maybe I just need to send a message.”
“What kind of message?” Lilith asked.
“I don’t know,” he shrugged, closing his eyes, “I’ll figure it out though.”
Lilith looked down unseeing at her fingers idly combing the blades of grass. Ripp had changed. Not much sure, but the changes were there. Subtle little shifts. She couldn’t help thinking this was a good thing. He certainly couldn’t keep going the way he had been.
Had Ripp himself brought about these changes or had Telesto had something to do with it? She hoped it was Ripp. He didn’t need to be changing for someone else. That couldn’t possibly be good. If Tel had something to do with it, well then she supposed she was grateful, if a bit hesitant. She liked the Alien, but she just couldn’t see him doing anything if it wasn’t also somehow for him as well.
She glanced up again. Ripp appeared to be sleeping leaning back against the tree. She caught a glimpse of Telesto coming toward them from the corner of her eye. Briefly she considered waking Ripp then thought better of it. If she wanted to know what was going on one of the best ways to find out was simply to watch.
“So,” Telesto said quietly crouching down beside the tree, “Am I interrupting or is there room for one more?”
Ripp’s eyes snapped open at the sound of the voice and he turned his head to meet the Alien’s gaze, a warm, welcoming smile spreading across his lips.
“Hey Tel,” Lilith wore a smile of her own, Ripp was glad to see the other boy and that put her at ease somewhat, “You aren’t interrupting, except maybe Ripp’s nap.”
“Did I?” Telesto asked, his tone gentle, concerned.
Ripp shook his head “No, I wasn’t really sleeping.”
“Good,” Telesto nodded flopping down beside Ripp, “Actually a nap sounds wonderful.”
Shifting himself around, he leaned back and propped his head against Lilith’s shoulder.
“Comfortable?” She asked shooting him a wry smile.
“Quite, yes,” he nodded, “I was stupid and tried some of that so called macaroni they have in the cafeteria today. My stomach hates me right now.”
Ripp let their conversation wash over him taking the opportunity to indulge in his favourite pastime of Telesto watching, unnoticed through half closed eyes
Slowly his eyes moved along the curve of the other boys jaw toward his ear. Ripp wondered briefly what it would be like to kiss the pale green flesh there just below the delicate shell of that deliciously pointed ear. Would Telesto tremble at the sensation? Maybe even let out a small gasp?
He really had to stop this sort of thing. It was bad enough that he was looking, did he have to fantasize while he was doing it? He thought on that for a moment deciding that, yes, actually, he did. What was the point of looking if not to fantasize?
Idly his eyes moved lower, along the line of neck, over the lightly toned chest, and down to where one hand was resting against a perfectly flat stomach. Lithe, the word came unbidden to his mind, but he immediately acknowledged it’s fitness to describe the body before him. Graceful as well, there was no doubt about that. He’d seen that first hand over the past few weeks watching the Alien dance. He was going to miss watching Tel dance when his lessons were over.
He was simply going to miss Tel.
When he had learned everything he could and things went back to how they had been before, he was really going to miss having the other boy all to himself. Okay so he was obnoxious and irritating and cocky, yes, but Ripp liked obnoxious and irritating and cocky. He also liked how Tel listened, and accepted and didn’t push for answers Ripp wasn’t comfortable giving.
He liked the way Tel smiled and laughed and he especially liked how his laugh made his eyes change colour. Everything made Tel’s eyes change colour shifting from blue to green and even sometimes purple. Ripp loved that.
There was that damn word again. Popping up while he was thinking about Telesto. Again. Really he should just admit it already. What good would that do though? Absolutely none, because he couldn’t even do this one little thing right. It wasn’t like he could just come right out and say ‘Hey Tel, I know your straight, but I’m not and you are an awesome friend and I love that, in fact I think I might sort of be kind of falling for you. You are okay with that right? And please tell me you would also be okay if I kissed you because I really, really want to.’ Hell he couldn’t even imagine saying it without sounding like an idiot.
No, he was not going to admit anything, not even to himself. This was just one more thing in a life of things that were best kept unacknowledged and well away from the light of day.
“Up!” Lilith insisted, jostling Telesto’s head with her shoulder and snapping Ripp out of his musing, “My arm is going to sleep.”
Telesto pouted at her, “But I was comfy,” he complained.
Sitting up to massage feeling back into her arm, Lilith rolled her eyes at him, “I’m sure you’ll live.”
Swinging himself around to lean back placing his head against Ripp’s stomach Telesto sighed, “Oh, never mind, this is much better.”
Ripp swallowed. Yes, that was better, and so much worse.
Telesto tilted his head shooting Ripp a smile, “You make a good pillow, very comfortable.”
Ripp returned the smile and settled back more comfortably against the tree. Content. Too bad he didn’t dare get used to this.
“You coming over tonight?” Telesto asked closing his eyes and getting more comfortable himself.
“Tel,” Ripp sighed, “It’s Friday.”
Telesto cracked an eye open glancing at Lilith, “Is it?”
Lilith nodded watching the pair in awe.
“Oh,” he closed his eyes again, “I guess we should go to FM then huh?”
Ripp snorted, “You think? We’ve ditched enough the last few weeks.”
“Hey, we went last week,” Telesto protested sleepily.
“Five minutes does not count, Tel,” Ripp countered.
“They are going to want to know,” Telesto warned, “Remember the questions from last week? That’s why we didn’t stay.”
Ripp frowned slightly but didn’t open his eyes, “Yeah, I know. Let’s just go. They can grill us for details and we can get it over with.”
“Mmm,” Telesto murmured, “I have a better plan.”
“Yeah?” Ripp paused as he let out a wide yawn, “What’s that?”
“I’ll tell you later,” Telesto mumbled shifting to get more comfortable, “Nap now.”
“’Kay,” Ripp agreed.
Lilith bit back a bewildered giggle not wanting to wake the boys from their nap. The past few minutes had certainly been enlightening with all the ‘we’ and ‘us’ they had been tossing around so casually.
Settling back on her elbows she started up at the underside of the tree, grinning. She’d make sure they got to class on time, but for now she would let them sleep. They looked too cute to wake before she absolutely had to.
* * *
5:00 PM Friday, May 9
“Lima bean salad!” Dirk exclaimed, “I’m not joking!”
Ripp did his best not to laugh.
“What is wrong with Lima bean salad?” Lilith asked.
“Nothing, if you like Lima beans. Which I don’t,” Dirk grumbled, “but there is no way you are going to get me to believe it will ‘help restore the balance of my chi’!”
“Lima beans?” Fen blinked at him.
“Lima beans,” Dirk nodded.
“Wait,” Tybalt frowned, “What the hell is chi?”
“Hell if I know,” Dirk sighed, “ask Haley.”
Lilith chuckled, “Sorry, Dirk, but I still think she sounds fun.”
“Good, then you can take my place next time she is cooking dinner,” Dirk replied.
“Stop whining, Dreamer,” Tybalt smirked at him, “You sound jealous.”
“I am not jealous,” Dirk assured him.
“You sure?” Fen cracked a smile, “Cause if my Dad was boning a hot twenty one year old blonde I might be jealous.”
The group dissolved into laughter. All except Dirk who shot Fen a glare.
Fen missed it; too busy trying to duck a playful swat from Rein.
Once they had settled down again, Tybalt turned his attention to Ripp.
“Where is your other half?”
Ripp furled a puzzled brow, “My what?”
“He insisted we all be here tonight,” Tybalt went on smirking slightly, “even though the rest of us always are, it is you two who ditch. So where is he?”
Ripp sighed, realizing Tybalt was referring to Telesto, “He is not my other half.”
“Could have fooled me,” Dirk chimed in, “I keep checking the mail for the wedding invitation.”
Ripp sank lower on the couch. What was it with everyone recently? First Tank and now his friends.
“Knock it off guys,” Juliet frowned, “I think it is great that they are such good friends. Stop teasing him about it.”
Ripp shot her a thankful smile, while appreciating just how strange it was to be grateful to the girlfriend of the guy you really wanted to be dating for sticking up for you that you were not in fact at all romantically involved with him.
“Fine,” Tybalt agreed, catching sight of Telesto across the room, “He’s finally here anyway.”
Ripp looked up.
Was he ever going to manage to look at Telesto and keep breathing?
Expectant silence hung over the corner as everyone waited for the Alien to join them. They were all curious to find out what was so important that he wanted to make sure they were all present.
“Okay,” Telesto looked around suspiciously as he took the seat next to Ripp, “Why so quiet?”
“We were waiting for you,” Juliet supplied.
“Yeah,” Dirk jumped in, “We wanted to know when the engagement party was and if we are all invited.”
Ripp groaned out loud, slightly horrified to note that even Lilith joined in with the small round of sniggering. Everyone joined in, except Juliet and Rein. What exactly was it with those two anyway?
“Do I want to know?” Telesto whispered.
Ripp shook his head, “Yeah, probably not.”
“Ah,” Telesto nodded with sudden understanding, “They are that kind of assholes today are they?”
Ripp nodded, “You are now my other half.”
“Am I?”
Ripp nodded once more, “Sorry.”
Telesto grinned, slinging his arm around Ripp’s shoulders, “We’ll let you know when we set the date, but you are not invited, Dreamer. We have a strict no dipshit policy.”
Ripp was torn between wanting to laugh along with everyone else at Dirk’s stunned expression and the urge to sink through the floor.
Eventually he settled on wondering why Telesto had not removed his arm now that the joke was over.
“What did you what to talk to us about?” Lilith asked, recovering from her laughter first.
“Right!” Telesto turned his full attention to Ripp, “Remember when we went shopping?” he asked, excited.
“Yeah,” Ripp nodded. Why had Tel still not moved his arm?
“Remember those clothes you were eying when you didn’t think I was looking?”
Ripp nodded again, blushing slightly, “Yeah …” Tel was not supposed to have seen him looking at those. Also, the arm, it was still there.
“You are going to want to buy those,” Telesto grinned.
“Okay … why?” Ripp wondered confused. The arm though, now that he thought about it, since Tel didn’t seem to be in a hurry to move it, that could stay.
“Because we are going to PURE tomorrow,” Telesto announced, his eyes sparkling.
Ripp blanched, “We who?”
“We me and you and whoever else wants to come with us!”
Ripp tensed. A club. Tel wanted to go to a club. Tel wanted to go to a club with dancing. Tel wanted to go to a club with dancing and he was supposed to go with him.
Suddenly Ripp felt a little queasy.
If he hadn’t been sitting down he probably would have been swaying on his feet. Of course even sitting down he seemed to be swaying a bit. That was an interesting sensation.
The hand still resting on his shoulder gave a gentle squeeze.
Oh. So that was why Tel hadn’t moved his arm. Trust Tel to know he was about to say something that was going to totally freak him out. Yet one more thing that made him an awesome friend. Right there with a reassuring shoulder squeeze when Ripp needed it most. Sure he had been the reason Ripp needed it, but really, that was just nit-picking details.
“Right,” Damon snorted, “Ripp doesn’t dance.”
Telesto grinned, finally sliding his hand from Ripp’s shoulder, “Says you.”
“Tel,” Ripp swallowed nervously, “I don’t think …”
“Don’t think,” Telesto interrupted, “Just do. Please?”
“We’re in,” Rein chimed in, Fen nodding his agreement beside her.
“Me too,” Juliet added.
“Awesome,” Telesto smiled, “I had something to ask you about anyway Jules. Talk Later?”
Juliet nodded.
“Hold up” Dirk frowned, “Seriously, Ripp, we’ve gone clubbing before and you never came with us claiming you can’t dance. So since when do you dance?”
Ripp ducked his head, “Umm, actually, since ... I am not sure I can really, not yet, but Tel …”
Telesto grinned mischievously at him, “Well enough? Since about a week ago. Since then it has pretty much just been ‘cause you are a lot of fun to dance with.”
Ripp gaped at him.
Dirk furled a brow, “So that is what you guys have been doing all this time?”
“Yup,” Telesto confirmed.
“This I definitely have to see. I’ll be there,” Dirk shook his head, “but I am not wearing anything stupid.”
“Suit yourself,” Telesto shrugged, “Lil? You coming?”
“Absolutely,” Lilith spoke up finally, smiling encouragingly at Ripp.
Ripp still wasn’t sure this was a good idea, “I don’t know,” he murmured, “PURE is a long way from my house. I would have to leave almost as soon as I got there.”
“You can sleep over at my house,” Lilith offered, “Come over early tomorrow and go shopping with me? I could use the company.”
Ripp stared down at his hands folded in his lap. That solved that issue didn’t it? “I guess …”
Against all probability Telesto’s smile got wider, “Perfect! Tomorrow you are going to dance with me properly.”
Ripp tried to smile while all around him his friends made plans about where to meet and when. He didn’t succeed very well. Dance with Tel properly. Why did that sound so much worse than it really was?
“Damon,” Tybalt began quietly, taking extra care not to be overheard, “please tell me your little brother has not just sunken his claws into poor innocent Ripp.”
Damon snorted, “Tel doesn’t have claws and even if he did Ripp is a guy. They are friends.”
“You all have claws, Love,” Tybalt assured him, “It’s a family trait.”
Damon shook his head, “Tel is straight and dating your sister or has that slipped your mind?”
“Dating my sister …” Tybalt’s brows rose as his voice trailed off.
“Yeah!” Damon shook his head once more, “Claws or not, Ripp is really not his type.”
Tybalt sat quietly watching the interaction taking place on the other couch. A moment later he grinned, “We are going with tomorrow,” he stated.
“But you hate dancing,” Damon countered, slightly puzzled.
“I do,” Tybalt agreed with a nod, “but there is no way in hell I am missing this!”
* * *
On to Part 2.
